Feb. 25th, 2010

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We dodged the bullet this year.  The legistalors decided to dip into the "Rainy Day Fund" & make up the deficit to get us through the end of the fiscal year.  Of course, it's mandated by State statute what our salaries are, so in the end, even if they furloughed us, they'd just have to pay us the money owed to us at a later date.  So, really, that wouldn't save them money in the long run.  So glad they decided to make this move-- large, heavy weight off of my shoulders.

I started my second job tonight.  It's like being back in the saddle again.  Missed Purcell so fucking much!  This money from this job will just be gravy money-- gonna build up my savings like a motherfucker.  So psyched!

My ex, Chris the cop, emailed me about two weeks ago.  He apologized for treating me the way he did & told me that he loved me still.  It was very emotional.  I cried when I read the email.  Since then he's told me he's still interested in seeing me romantically.  I agreed to one date, but told him explicitely that I will not be seeing him exclusively, that I was different from how I used to be, & am dating around.  He didn't like that at all.  He told me he was a jealous guy & wouldn't be comfortable with me seeing other guys.  I told him point blank that he hurt me all those months ago-- broke my heart, even-- & I wasn't ready to put all my eggs in one basket because I didn't trust him not to drop them.  I said if he wanted to see me, he'd have to do things my way.  I have a right to be cautious & protect myself.  I don't trust him not to repeat what he did.  He destroyed the trust between us.  He's going to have to prove to me that he's not a complete asshole...

I'm dating someone new.  I know, I know, ALREADY?!?!?!?  I gotta move on sometime, right?  I weeped over Charlie for over a month-- literally every single day... It's time to move on.  My buddy Sean is so freaking glad, too.  He was beginning to lose hope that his fun drinking buddy wouldn't ever come back.  Charlie ended up pussying out completely in the end.  We won't be friends.

So, I met this guy on Valentine's day at Citywalk, where I am a regular, along with my buddy Sean.  Ironically, Citywalk is where I first met Charlie.  We used to chill in the karaoke room all night long along with Sean.  It's hard still to go back there.  It's still weird being there sans Charlie.  Citywalk just isn't the same; life just isn't the same...  Anyway, I was tired of being in that room, so I grabbed Sean & we walked around the club & hung out.  We ended up in Boogie Nights & were getting some dancing in before the club closed & I ended up dancing with this really pretty asian guy until the club closed.  I gave him my number & he texted me the next day.  He kept kinda texting me the next couple of days & we set up a coffee date later in the week.  I didn't know what kind of a person he was going to be.  I honestly thought he was going to be a douchebag like all the other guys I've ever met.  He was 30 minutes late for our date, but after he finally showed up & we got past the awkward first few minutes, we ended up talking for two hours.  Then we decided to go see a movie-- Wolfman sucks, don't waste your money because Benicio Del Toro is terrible-- & afterwards ate at IHOP.  We had a blast.  It was a good date.  Since then, we've seen each other most days in the week.

He's very interesting.  He's originally from Nepal.  He's bilingual & has been in the States for two years going to college for a computer science degree.  He's two years younger than I am, but it doesn't seem to matter.  It doesn't "feel" like he's younger... It's strange, but also feels so good. All I care about is that I can take him anywhere.  He's been single for about 5 years because he got his heart royally broken.  He told me he's tired of being alone & he's very glad he met me.  Things are moving quite quickly between us, but for some reason I'm not too terribly bothered by it.  Maybe this is what I've been waiting for & this is what I'm ready for.  I've never met anyone like him before.  He treats me like I hung moon.  It's a very nice & huge change from how men normally treat me.  I don't feel like I'm begging for table scraps.

I guess we'll see how things go.  I'm already contemplating agreeing to moving to "girlfriend" status.

Guess I'm gonna end up telling Chris to go fuck himself...

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